[This was a post I thought I lost. I'm re-introducing it as a #BeWoW post. This was a great night in September, 2014]
Sometime last September during a low-key social, Hubby turned to our close friend and whispered to her -
What Hubby said was quite significant. In the last several months, I’ve been wound up really tight. I’ve been afraid to let go. You see, I’ve had some experiences that scared me a little. I opened my heart to some people in my life who landed up disrespecting me (this is putting it lightly). When you wear your heart on your sleeve, this type of result is devastating. It taught me to be a little more cautious and guarded around people. Unfortunately, I also guarded myself from people who were trustworthy — people I could consider friends. It took awhile, but I am learning to trust myself and others. I am learning to let go a little. As you can imagine, I felt honored to hear Hubby say that he experienced me as more open.
My openness is closely related to my sacral chakra energy. Located in the area above the belly button, this chakra is connected to sexuality, relationships, creativity, and intimacy – among other things (see link above). It is no wonder then, that until recently, I was having problems in these areas. In fact, I think I confused my friends by mostly being closed and reserved with the occasional burst of attention-seeking, fun energy. I’ve learned a lot about myself lately. I need creativity and openness to thrive. I am most happy when I’m connected to myself and others. True friendships are vital to me living a joyous life. I also require some time alone to reflect, write, and listen to music. When I don’t have my “me” time, I cannot be present for anyone else. I guess you could say I need “me” time before “we” time. I felt validated that I was more connected to my world and my inner self, when Hubby stated, "I see You, Goddess."
This is what I having been hoping for all along. It is why I write. It is why I sing. It is why I honor the special bonds I have with others. It is scary to be vulnerable when you’ve been hurt before. On the other hand, while closing your heart is safe, it only leads to isolation, loneliness, and disconnection. I would rather risk being hurt again over being cut off from what I love – from what gives me joy and wholeness.
-Just some food for thought…
Sometime last September during a low-key social, Hubby turned to our close friend and whispered to her -
Tweet He was talking about me, of course. My heart melted. What did he mean? In a nutshell, he could see that I was more comfortable with myself and my surroundings. I was light-hearted and fun to be around. Yes, my playful sexuality came out once or twice, too (my yummy Tequila Rose liquor probably helped.“Her Goddess is coming out.”
What Hubby said was quite significant. In the last several months, I’ve been wound up really tight. I’ve been afraid to let go. You see, I’ve had some experiences that scared me a little. I opened my heart to some people in my life who landed up disrespecting me (this is putting it lightly). When you wear your heart on your sleeve, this type of result is devastating. It taught me to be a little more cautious and guarded around people. Unfortunately, I also guarded myself from people who were trustworthy — people I could consider friends. It took awhile, but I am learning to trust myself and others. I am learning to let go a little. As you can imagine, I felt honored to hear Hubby say that he experienced me as more open.
My openness is closely related to my sacral chakra energy. Located in the area above the belly button, this chakra is connected to sexuality, relationships, creativity, and intimacy – among other things (see link above). It is no wonder then, that until recently, I was having problems in these areas. In fact, I think I confused my friends by mostly being closed and reserved with the occasional burst of attention-seeking, fun energy. I’ve learned a lot about myself lately. I need creativity and openness to thrive. I am most happy when I’m connected to myself and others. True friendships are vital to me living a joyous life. I also require some time alone to reflect, write, and listen to music. When I don’t have my “me” time, I cannot be present for anyone else. I guess you could say I need “me” time before “we” time. I felt validated that I was more connected to my world and my inner self, when Hubby stated, "I see You, Goddess."
This is what I having been hoping for all along. It is why I write. It is why I sing. It is why I honor the special bonds I have with others. It is scary to be vulnerable when you’ve been hurt before. On the other hand, while closing your heart is safe, it only leads to isolation, loneliness, and disconnection. I would rather risk being hurt again over being cut off from what I love – from what gives me joy and wholeness.
-Just some food for thought…
Mandy,
ReplyDeleteI can completely relate to this:
"When I don’t have my “me” time, I cannot be present for anyone else."
And bless your husband and his heart for yours. What a gift to love and be loved that way!!
Under the same sky,
Dani
P.S. Just love the hummingbirds! Beautiful...